Caffeinated Dad Jokes

Father’s Day, the one day a year completely dedicated to our dads. It’s a day to thank and appreciate the dad bod figure in your life for all he’s done. It’s also the one day a year that dads can say as many dad jokes in 24 hours as humanly possible—and we can’t do anything about it. 

To commemorate all the hardworking dads out there, we put together a few coffee-related jokes to add to the celebration. Happy Father’s Day to all the dads, grandfathers, brothers, uncles, and friends out there. Warning: these jokes are dadly. 

An image of Dad balloons hung up in front of hundreds of ties.

Dad: Why did the coffee file a police report? Because it was mugged. 

Dad: How are coffee beans like kids? They’re always getting grounded.

Dad: Why be wary of 5-cent espresso? It’s a cheap shot.

Dad: Why did the espresso check its watch? Because it was pressed for time.

Dad: What’s the technical name for coffee at work? Break fluid.

You: *spills coffee on the floor*
Dad: You are so…grounded. 

You: Dad, this coffee tastes like dirt. 
Dad: That’s not surprising. It was just ground this morning. 

You: Dad, can you help me with this?
Dad (making coffee with a French Press): I can’t. I’m a little pressed for time. 

Dad walks into a restaurant: How much is a cup of coffee? 
Waitress: $2
Dad: What about refills? 
Waitress: They’re free.
Dad: I’ll just take a refill, please. 

Dad: Your mom was supposed to meet me for coffee at 11, but she didn’t show up until noon. I guess better latte than never.

Still need a gift for Father’s Day? Check out our most dadly gifts in the game.

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